Y’all.
Things are happening and the excitement is terrifying and I’m so scared to say it out loud.
Also---lots of unofficial, not done yet stuff going on here. So I’m going to give the edited version and leave out some information so I can ask you to be praying, but I promise to give more details as soon as things are more official!
We are switching countries. That started back in November. SO much paperwork. We are almost done with the home study update. Once that is complete we will be waiting for immigration again. We’ve gathered most of our dossier documents. Everything will be notarized and then apostilled (remember, that’s where the Secretary of State of the state in which the document was notarized puts his/her stamp on the document as well). We’ve had our blood tests and TB tests (still clear in case you were concerned). We’ve had our backgrounds checked yet again by state police and social services. Still have to be checked by FBI and USCIS (immigration).
Paperwork. Ugh.
Why? Why did God, after six years, release us from Azerbaijan?
We *THINK* (I’ve learned not to speak with certainty about this sort of thing)...we think it is because of this child. This child in the Republic of Georgia who was just about to be available for adoption whose heritage is Azerbaijani. Yes, seriously. Our agency mentioned the child in conversation when they asked us to consider switching countries. We were on speaker phone, sitting on the curved couch in our living room, phone on the table. Our eyes met and we both nodded. We’ve been asked this question so many times before! Always, always we’ve felt caution and asked for time to pray. This time it was like a weight was lifted suddenly. We nodded! Kyle spoke for us. Yes, let’s do it. Let’s switch countries.
They reminded us a few times that this child--there was no way to guarantee. We understand. Not ours. But maybe….maybe God’s plan is beginning to unfold.
On December 22 they sent us a picture and a video and the world stopped turning for several minutes. Did you not feel that??? My sis in law has a habit of being in my house when crazy things happen related to our adoption. I couldn’t even form coherent sentences. I just demanded that she come and look. Then I made her promise not to say a word. Sorry, Kayla!!
But still, this child is not ours. Not yet. Not promised to us. We wrote a letter to the official people over there and waited for more. Please, Lord. And we got busy with our paperwork.
But days passed. And weeks. Over a month and no word. I realized I’d gotten my hopes up for nothing.
Last night our church had a night of prayer and worship. The band plays on and off and people read scripture and pray from the stage and all around the room. People stand, sit, or kneel as the Spirit moves. I was so mad at myself for the first hour and a half that we were there. My thoughts were consumed with the adoption. I didn’t want that to be my sole focus...I’ve worked so hard to keep it from being an idol in my life...to find a healthy balance between wishing for this child and being focused on the here and now. But after being there a while, I figured I may as well tell the Lord how I felt. I begged him for something, anything. Any little piece of news. I asked him the burning question. The one I repeatedly have to push down and out of my heart and mind. “How long, Lord???”
After I was honest with the Lord, I moved on. I prayed and worshipped. It was so peaceful and God’s Spirit was so present.
When I left I called Kyle (who had left early to take Matthew to bed). He asked, “Have you checked your email?”
Videos. Pictures. Medical information. A birthday. A name. All arrived in my inbox around the same time I was begging the Lord to give us some little piece of movement!
Wait, wait, wait. Now hold on with your excitement. This is terrifying! It isn’t a referral---just information to find out if we are interested (DUH). We aren’t even approved and registered to adopt in their country yet! There are so many pieces that have to fall in place. So. Many. Pieces.
Please pray! Pray for this child. This child who has a name and a gender and a story who is known and loved by God! Pray for health and comfort. Pray for caregivers.
Pray for our hearts, that we would stay focused on the Lord. If this doesn’t go the way we hope, our faith in God is what will help us continue on the path he has set out for us. And if it DOES go the way we hope, he will be the one to walk us through the life changes ahead!
And would you just ask...would you beg a little...that this would be it? That this child would be the one? That we would see God work his wonders in this adoption?
Do me a favor and don’t ask us about the child yet. We have been trusted with information that is not ours to share, so please make it easy on us and don’t ask. This information here is all we will be sharing for a while. Also, while Matthew does know that we are switching countries, he does not know anything about the child. He asks weekly about getting a sibling, and we would like to spare him some disappointment if this one is not the one.
We’ll keep you posted as we finish paperwork. It will probably be a few months before anything can possibly happen because we have to be “official.” Thank you for continuing to bear with us through this long and twisty road!
